Traditionally, I've been bad at asking for what I want. For years I agonized over making the most basic requests. After the hurdle of getting the words out, the challenge became asking without making a “scrunched-up” face.
A few years ago, I read if you don’t ask, the answer is always 'no.'
It shook me up and helped initially, but eventually grew stale.
But last week I found this: if you ask, there’s a 50% chance you’ll get what you want.
Even I know those odds are solid.
Just by asking. All you need to do is open your mouth and politely, succinctly make a request. Could life be so straightforward?
The potential outcomes are clear:
- an outright “no.” This is rare but still good. (more on this later)
- compromise. Warlords aside, people are inclined to strike a bargain. Even if this wasn’t your plan, it’s closer to your goal than the no-by-default you’d have from not speaking up. Your odds just increased from 50/50.
- you get what you want! Yay!
To make asking less daunting, think of it not an ego-driven quest but as a fact-finding mission. You come seeking knowledge. You're just wondering.
The great aspect of information of any sort is how it yields clarity, giving direction, moving you closer to your desires.
Which is why even hearing “no” is useful.
Plus, dealing with the thought instead of trapping it in your mind frees up energy, making you more capable of handling any outcome.
How do you feel about asking for what you want?
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