We’d just finished class when he began Dropboxing me a document in real time. Standing nearby as human collateral to guarantee he’d follow through, my yoga teacher poked and swiped at his phone while I gathered my props.
Dropboxing at any time, though, is a fool’s errand, the 21st century’s form of faxing. After all these years we’re still wondering: where is it now? Are we sure it went through? Do we know they know it’s there?
“I could do this, if I weren’t an idiot,” he muttered.
“Is that really how a yoga teacher should talk about himself?” I asked.
“I’m just being honest,” he said.
Is he ever! But about a hell of a lot more than his Dropboxing skills. There was no self-deprecation in his tone. He did not say it for effect. He actually thinks he’s a moron.
Nothing new here. Lots of us do. Moseying through life we grow convinced, I am dumb.
But it doesn’t end there. Because we’re also sure: Others think I’m cool, good, worth knowing. In short, an overall non-knucklehead.
If I’d said, “You know, if you weren’t stupid you could do this,” he would’ve had me in a secret yoga teacher headlock before I could say “Om.”
With such a double standard—I know I deserve crap but others respect me—what could go wrong?
Ideally, the treatment you radiate and the kind you receive should be equal. Not because you dictate others’ behavior—another fool’s errand—but because people learn your boundaries based on what you accept from them. And what you tolerate is influenced by what you think you deserve, which is determined by how you see yourself.
Essentially, your self-image turns into actions, which give others information about how much crap you’ll take. What to do?
Align the whole enterprise: how you handle, talk to, talk about, think of and imagine yourself to how you want to be seen. Because that’s what others are learning from. If you forget, just ask, would I tolerate this from anyone else? Adjust accordingly.
Plus, we all know, “Let’s see how this goes…” is the best one can hope for with mobile Dropboxing.
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