it's time for the stunning conclusion.
with the exception of my mom, who was proud and persuaded my formative years in Philly paid off, i have an exclusively male live audience listening to (tolerating?) me, so i’ve only discussed the incident with them.
their responses have been…lackluster. instead of praising me—“you’re a crime-stopping superhero, julia!” would’ve sufficed—the guys focus on the scammers’ shoddy argument. their perspective skews, “he’s full of it. end of story.”
the men (rightly) move from a place of i did nothing wrong and won’t doubt myself because you think i should and eventually apologize if necessary.
women work in the opposite direction. first they accept blame and maybe get vindicated later.
i have a feeling that if i’d told my story to a bunch of women, at least one would’ve asked, “well, i mean…did you hit him?” and i know some would have done whatever he wanted, even if it was just sharing car insurance information.
before you say i’m exaggerating, dig this.
after they drove away i stayed in my car to regroup. it was invigorating to feel the energy coursing through me and my heart pounding strongly. i felt completely alive and omnipotent.
telling myself, i did it! i totally fucking did it! i out-scammed a scammer! while waiting for my heart rate to return to normal, i saw the knuckleheads speed up the street in the opposite direction. then, i watched in my side view mirror as they got out and began their routine on another girl!
i grabbed my yoga gear and walked up to them. by the time i arrived, their next victim was out of her car looking at the “scratches” they accused her of creating and, you guessed it, apologizing.
i asked her if the men said she’d hit their car and she said yes. meanwhile, the main guy waved his arms at me as if to say, “stop talking!” i ignored him and told her my story.
the guy tried to defend himself, claiming he thought the other girl was me. to be clear, prospective victim two was Japanese and driving a gray Prius. so, identical to me, a white girl driving a black Golf.
they left when it became clear i wasn’t going to be quiet. the girl thanked me profusely and we calmed each other down from our crime-prevention high.
in short, those losers didn’t pick me by chance! they assumed young women alone would be gullible morons.
while it’s easy to write off women who cite their emotions as malleable, touchy-feely whack-os, it’s a mistake. not all emotion is silly and misleading. in fact, the delicious irony of this story is how i used flakey-sounding intuition to beat them at their own game.
women are sitting on a potent, powerful natural force—their intuition. tuned into the truth by default, they know exactly what to do. the difficulty is getting familiar with how intuition feels and operates, especially in a society that prefers facts and logic.
by conditioning your intuition, it becomes more acute. likewise, you’ll become attuned to its messages and how to interpret them.
here are some resources to help:
- these two articles take different approaches on understanding your intuition. from mindbodygreen.com, a straightforward take. and rebellesociety.com gives a more personal perspective.
once you learn how to harness your intuition, it’s time to differentiate between fear and intuition.
- “Reliable intuition feels right, it has a compassionate, affirming tone to it. It confirms that you are on target, without having an overly positive or negative feel to it,” from Rosalie Puiman’s description in her Huffington Post article. additional clues are: intuition is ONLY about the present but fear is usually linked to the past or future.
- finally, you can use this list of how intuitive people operate to incorporate it into your life.
have you ever been in a similar situation, where you defended yourself based on gut feelings despite being scared? tell me about it in the comments, even if it wasn't in a "crime-stopping superhero" capacity.
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